In today’s dating culture the “talking stage” has in some cases become more popular than relationships themselves, but not everyone agrees on whether they actually work. For some people it’s a chance to build a connection. For others, it’s confusing, awkward, and often ends in disappointment. After interviewing three Prairie falcons it’s clear that talking stages come with both benefits and downsides.
Marshal Johnson defines a talking stage as “the period before you start dating,” while Daphne Dirks describes it more simply as “getting to know someone.” Even in these definitions, there’s a slight contrast of the purpose of a talking stage. While some think it’s the first step toward dating, others could see it as more friendly than that . That difference in perspective may explain why talking stages can feel unclear from the start.
One common theme among all three interviews was that talking to multiple people at once is acceptable, as long as no one is officially “locked in.” This shows that many students see talking stages as a non-exclusive phase, where commitment isn’t expected yet. However, that same lack of commitment has proven to create drama and problems. Loyalty clearly isn’t something that is expected which is the key difference between a talking stage and a relationship.
According to Carson Morningstar , one of the biggest issues is communication. He says that “talking stages are kinda awkward, you don’t really express yourselves,” which can lead to misunderstandings and mixed signals. That lack of clarity is a major reason why many talking stages don’t seem to last or end in a messy way.
When asked whether talking stages are actually helpful the opinions were diverse. Carson was more critical, saying they “definitely lead to confusion.” On the other hand, Marshal Johnson defended them saying “Talking stages are necessary because how are you going to lock in with somebody if you don’t go through a talking stage.” Daphne Dirks took a more balanced view, explaining that “they can hurt someone but they’re good to get to know someone.” So overall it seems that a talking stage means something a little different to everyone and that could be why they tend to be short lasting because people want different things.
Overall, talking stages seem to sit somewhere in the middle, they can help people connect, but they can also lead to confusion and emotional stress, especially with different motives from different people. I would be especially careful if you expect loyalty early on. Whether they are harmless fun or an emotional mess may depend on how clearly people communicate and what they expect going into them.
